- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion
- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion
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that seems to be a defense of conspiracy theories.
otherwise it should read “everything is a conspiracy when you don’t understand how anything works” — without the word theory.
Huh. I guess it’s not the Jews this time.
Who do You think she meant by “they”?
US Postal Service, actually. How do you think they can promise “Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.”
(Yes, that noise you’re hearing in the background is my manic cackle idly daydreaming about conspiracy theorists running with this.)
I mean… what do you think the space lasers are for since they are not being used for Peace™ right now.
/s because it’s sadly necessary
Pretty sure it was a certain subset of democrats she was talking about
But is it the same laser? Are weather controlling space lasers more of a rent and not buy? Or do we have the occasional dueling space lasers of someone didn’t make it to the mind virus meeting?
Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene has sparked a backlash after appearing to suggest that Democrats "can control the weather.
Her tweet was “Democrats control the weather.”
She’s not suggesting anything.
Wait, instead of blaming the weather on God’s wrath for the gays, they’re just straight up blaming Democrats now? Have they lost their faith or did they never have it in the first place?
Saying it’s God’s judgment is bad when it destroys the places attacking abortions, trans rights, and gays.
They don’t want to admit that God may be against them.
Weather control claims are firmly in the weird category.
“We can change the weather”
Also
“Climate change isn’t real”
Pick a fucking lane lady.
wEaThEr IsNt cLiMaTe!1!
if we could actually get them to say this we would be making headway.
Unironically this is something I heard in Texas during the freeze a couple years ago
She seems the type to think all the lanes belong to her and fuck you, get out of her way!
Careful, since weather and climate are the same to them, they’ll say the democrats are intentionally heating up the climate so they have an excuse to take away their beloved coal rolling trucks.
well. there are some weather control technologies that actually exist. Like seeding rain for crops. it’s fairly common in most places these days.
but there’s no way to precipitate a hurricane or stop one.
We could try nuking it.
“About 3 minutes and ding its done!”
And this is the problem with the way she worded it and everyone blowing it off as just weird instead of straight up fucking stupid.
well she didn’t mean any of the rain precipitators. She meant, they actively controlled hurricanes. It’s both weird and fucking stupid.
Actually. I wonder what would happen if you took a microwave array, of appropriately huge power, and directed it at the hurricane’s flanks, you know. to heat up the water on that side. maybe make some wind. I bet you could steer it “some”…
(Mexico, if you’re reading this, I absolutely won’t try this, if you send me your best street taco recipe.)
She didn’t know what she means. I bet she’s heard of SA rain control in some off handed meeting and just strung a line of bullshit from that. Then weasel worded this so she could fall back on that.
Appears!? She literally tweeted, “Yes they can control the weather.”
I read that as in “shows up to say”.
No, that’s the Korporate News Kushion for Konservatives
It’s that neutral “both sides” media bullshit- just like you can’t call someone “school shooter”, it’s “alleged school shooter” until the court ruling come down the pipe six months later.
Is this better? Idk.
This idea has been floating around the right for a while. I think it’s a way to explain the effects of climate change while blaming the libs.
If they could, Helene would have erased Mar-a-Lago from the map.
While I enjoy the humor, the fact is they’d have aimed it away from landfall.
I mean, if you could control the weather, why not make a Mar-a-Lago sized hurricane?
I’d rather drop that “mini moon” that’s in temporary earth orbit for a bit here. It’s only 33ft and would probably burn up in atmosphere…but I’m sure we could figure out a way to get a just-large-enough chunk to survive hitting The Swamp ™️
Look bud, we only control the weather, not “near-earth objects”!
Plus, that 'roid is just doing his thing vibin with the cosmos. He doesn’t need to be bothered with our shit.
be fair. nobody needs to be bothered with our shit.
but we like to share!
Something something JoJo stand microscopic meteors
Democrats see a mentally ill person standing on the corner ranting and raving and shouting insane gibberish, and they think it’s sad and we should help that poor person.
Republicans see the same thing and think we should elect that poor person.
So the Democrats control the weather, but humans burning fossil fuels does nothing to the climate
Hilarious that people who don’t believe in climate change also believe that the weather can be controlled and targeted at specific communities. And by “hilarious” I mean “makes me want to start hitchhiking to Uruguay”.
I thought about that only to realize that the people Uruguay are probably equally as bad and I’m stuck here on this rock with billions of them until someone gives me a ride.
There is a giant ball there. And evil apes. And the evil apes are dukin’ it out on the ball. You’re one of them. It’s basically all just evil apes dukin’ it out on a giant ball.
Was this during their attempt to take over Central City and destroy The Flash? Do they also have a freeze gun, spin like a top, and jump into mirrors?
Yeah one of my cousins even mentioned some dude he knows was saying the Dems intentionally shifted the hurricane to clear out the area for lithium mining
If Democrats had thst power I feel we use it to wipe her and Donald Trump along rest of Maga out of this country. I wish we had Xman like Storm. Blow Trump plabe right out of the sky and into the sea.
No kidding. If Dems could do that, Florida would already be underwater.
Very charitable to assume her “they” meant The Democrats and not The Jews.
Or maybe that weird ass HAARP conspiracy from awhile back.
If this is true, we gotta talk Biden into running again. I don’t care if he can’t talk or stay awake, I’ll definitely vote for the weathermancer every time!
The Weathermancer™️.
From Stormy Delaware comes Cloudy Joe and his Lightning Lasers.
Newsweek: “appears to say”
She literally wrote: "“Yes they can control the weather,”
They really think we live in Red Alert 2
