The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/Secure_Reporter4559 on 2024-05-02 14:33:40.

My ex and I share custody of our 13 year old son and 11 year old daughter. We divorced 9 years ago. My ex is now happily remarried going on 3 years now. We’re okay with each other. Mostly civil but we’re not close and don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things post-divorce.

This is a conflict that stems from a couple of different things but I really wanna know what others think.

So I picked my kids up from my ex’s parents house on Sunday. Ex and his wife, plus the kids, all of ex’s family and many of his wife’s family members were there. Ex called me back to the yard to talk and he told me he had told the kids they were grounded for a week with no phone or internet and for another week they would be doing acts of kindness for his wife.

He punished them because during this family gathering they decided to do a game where the moms and their kids teamed up. The kids continued sitting and when asked why they said because their mom (meaning me) wasn’t there. They were told they would be teaming up with “their other mom” and my kids asked why, ex’s wife isn’t their mom. Ex told them she acts as their mom at their house and my kids said she’s not their mom and wouldn’t ever be their real mom though. My son said they’d need to call me to participate in a mom and kid game.

Everyone was furious they would speak about their stepmom that way and for using the term real mom. My ex told them to apologize and neither would. My son told his dad he shouldn’t have to apologize for telling the truth.

I arrived about an hour later and everyone was still angry about what happened. My ex also told me that his wife started to cry and both kids rolled their eyes. He told me I need to take care of grounding them for a week so that the next time the kids are with him they can get to the acts of kindness for his wife.

I told him I didn’t see what they did as a punishable offense. He told me I was ignoring the fact it should have been clear who they were supposed to team up with. I told him they weren’t wrong that his wife isn’t their mom though. He told me it shouldn’t matter and they should be far willing to team up with his wife. I asked why they called it mom and kid instead of parent and kid then. But I was clear I would not ground them for it. Ex was furious. The families kept watching and I know they could hear from the glares I was getting as I left with the kids.

Ex has texted me several times through the week saying I was wrong and I made his wife feel like shit in front of their families. AITA?