The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/Stressed_Owl_1234 on 2025-02-19 00:57:25.

AITA -I am getting married and invited my 4 closest friends to be my bridesmaids. We’ve been friends for over 10 years. We’ve always talked about taking an overseas trip, so I suggested we do it before my wedding. Everyone seemed keen since we’ve all been busy with work.

At a lunch, I mentioned looking at flights and suggested we go during school holidays (as one of them is a teacher), even though it would be pricier. To make it easier on them, I offered to pay for accommodation. No one objected, so we booked flights.

Over the next few months, I asked for input on accommodation. No one responded, so I booked a resort with free cancellation. Later, one bridesmaid pointed out bad reviews, so I found an Airbnb. Then another bridesmaid said an Airbnb wasn’t safe and preferred a resort. I told her to suggest options, which she did, but some were over my budget.

I narrowed it down to two resorts and told the group that going with a resort might mean chipping in a few hundred dollars each. They all agreed on Option B (which had two affordable rooms or a pricier villa that kept us together). When I went to book, the two rooms were gone, so I booked the villa (free cancellation) and asked them to cover the remainder.

That’s when things blew up. Some were upset they hadn’t been told they’d have to pay. One said they were saving for a house and had assumed accommodation would be covered. They accused me of blindsiding them and going back on my word. It also came out that they were hesitant about the flight costs but didn’t say anything because they didn’t want to hurt my feelings—me covering accommodation had “softened the blow” of the flights cost.

One bridesmaid (not part of the original group) told me she was prepared to pay since it was a holiday and just wanted to have fun. I assumed everyone felt that way. Now, I feel blindsided and bad vibes about the trip.

Did I pressure them into this? Should I have asked more clearly before booking? I’m honestly considering canceling, but the flights are already paid for.

TL;DR: I offered to pay for accommodation on a bachelorette trip. When I booked a pricier but better option that required extra contribution, my bridesmaids got upset and accused me of blindsiding them.