The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/Old-Sun3988 on 2024-12-25 04:02:16.

WIBTA for skipping Christmas with my family to relax and avoid socializing? I’m not personally religious by any means but I’ve never actually skipped it because I celebrate it as time with family. In full honestly I wouldn’t even think twice about skipping f it weren’t for the fact it’s my mother favorite holiday and she’s been looking forward to it all year. Heck, she was upset I worked today (Christmas Eve). She loves playing board games and watching TV and spoiling everyone rotten with gifts and making Lasagna.

For context, my mother has an absolute bleeding heart and a tendency to “adopt” random people. This includes my sister in law’s siblings (and their boyfriends… Both of which were never actually invited by my mother and just let invited themselves). She buys them gifts, makes their favorite foods (for the people she actually invited or knew was coming), etc. The whole nine-yards. And I love her for it. I think it makes her such a wonderful person and I couldn’t be prouder to be her daughter.

The problem comes in the form that A) I don’t know these people, I do not consider them part of my inner circle and thus do not consider them family for it to be a family event anymore. And B) I have severe social anxiety. Like last year I spent doped on an edible (legal in my state) to avoid full blown panic and don’t remember ANY of it. I literally just slept the entire time. Truthfully, I can also get very, VERY mean when I’m overwhelmed or find myself in said panic and can never think straight. There is also no stepping away, as my old bedroom is now a reading room with no privacy and the noise would just be too much and I always smell awful because I sweat so damn much and I genuinely hate it. I also hate being touched and people being within arms reach of me but only my mom and sister-in-law respect that boundary. They all seem to want hugs or to be in my bubble.

I am not on medication for this. And I do not want to spend Christmas high to the point I just sleep through it to get through it.

I know this makes me a horrible person. But I just really don’t want to deal with it. I don’t have my mom’s bleeding heart or need to randomly adopt other people just because. I also don’t want to the resident Jackass during Christmas to everyone and ruin their holiday because I can’t seem to get over myself or have control of my damn emotions. It’s not fair to them, and I don’t think it’s fair to have to be higher than a kite to avoid it. It’s not like I wouldn’t drop by once everyone leaves or just visit the day after for my mom.

But I also can’t just tell her WHY Id be skipping because then I’d be the asshole for not wanting to share the holiday just because I don’t want to socialize and I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings by saying “oh, they aren’t family and I don’t want to spend time with them”. Like I’m mean, but I try not to be cruel. And it literally makes everyone’s day to come over to her house. I ain’t popping that bubble.

So… WIBTA?