The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/EmergencyMedium6009 on 2024-12-07 11:44:19.
I 26F recently lost my brother 47M. Two days after his death, our aunt contacted us requesting some of his ashes. Some back story, this aunt and her sisters have been evil to my brother and myself our entire lives. We later found out it was their hatred for our mother which fueled it. They would say mean things, leave us out of gatherings and more. As well as our grandmother. My mother finally removed me from the situation but my brother was old enough to make his own decisions and he always hoped they’d love him for real and stuck around. My brother was diagnosed with a terminal illness and that’s when my aunts came out of the woodwork to “take care” of him. Providing him somewhere to stay or giving him some money. But it wasn’t out of the goodness of their hearts. Once he got well enough to care for himself, they’d leave him again till he was on death’s door again. Flash forward to now. He passed and my aunt sends my mother a fake condolence text where she quickly asks for some of his ashes because it would make her family feel better with his passing. No apology for how they treated my mother or two of her children for years. No real sentiment behind what she was saying. Everything was drowned out by the fact that she wanted his ashes so HER and HER family could feel better after his passing. Nothing about what my mother or myself might need. Nothing about helping us out with anything. Being there if we needed them. Just sorry your son died but my family and I feel sad about it so can you let us have something incredibly intimate so we can feel better? My mother couldn’t believe it and didn’t answer but I sent my own message in secret telling her how disrespectful her text was and her lack of empathy was astounding. I told her no she couldn’t have any ashes and to never contact my mother again. Suddenly I am the bad guy because my aunts feel they deserve some of his ashes. AITA?