The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/baseball-louie on 2024-10-12 21:12:24.
My cousin Christie (27F) got engaged a few months ago and asked my sister Jessica (20F) and I (25F) to be bridesmaids in her wedding. She recently sent the bridesmaid dress she picked for us in the bridal party group chat, and everyone immediately gushed about how much we loved it, and Christie was clearly very happy and excited about the dress. It’s an orange satin dress with a pink floral pattern. It’s definitely a very bright and bold choice, but I personally think it’s really pretty, and fits her colorful tropical wedding theme really nicely.
However, my sister Jessica HATES everything about dress. She thinks the color is ugly, the pattern is tacky, and that satin is impractical for a beach wedding. She does not want to be seen wearing it or have pictures of her in posted on social media. She has been begging me to help her talk to Christie about it and tell her to pick a different dress, or let us choose our own dresses. She also wants to reach out to the other bridesmaids (who are mostly Christie’s friends who we barely know yet) and ask them their opinion, because she is certain no one else likes the dress.
I’ve told Jessica that she just needs to suck it up, because part of being a bridesmaid is realizing the day is not about you or your preferences. We are there to support the bride and make the day special for her. Christie clearly has a certain vision for her dream wedding, and I feel like wearing the dress she wants for one day is not a huge ask.
Jessica does not see it that way, and believes she should not be made to wear a something she is not comfortable in. It would be different if her discomfort came from the dress being too revealing, or if she wasn’t comfortable wearing dresses in general. But her argument basically boils down to the dress being ugly in her opinion and not her style. I don’t know how we would confront Christie with this without insulting her taste and potentially hurting her feelings.
The wedding is still 8 months away, so if I’m the asshole here and should try to change Christie’s mind on behalf of my sister, now is the time to do it before everyone has bought the dresses and gotten alterations. But I would rather just avoid the drama.
EDIT: since a couple people asked to see the dress I will try to add the link to it. dress
EDIT 2: Hi, I really appreciate everyone weighing in! It’s nice to see that the dress is equally divisive amongst you all as it was between my sister and I. I will be showing this thread to my sister, and I definitely will not be bringing up her problems about taste/style to my cousin (which I never had any desire to do in the first place). However some people have shown me that the site selling the dress has pretty bad reviews, and it may be risky to try to buy from there. Thank you for bringing this to my attention, this is definitely worth letting my cousin know. Hopefully we can find the dress on a better site, or she can at least find another one with a similar vibe and price point.