The original post: /r/mildlyinfuriating by /u/ChameleonOnReddit on 2024-10-12 23:31:48.

tl;dr: Presents must always be fancy surprises with lots of good will but either no actual thought behind it or way too much thought and they refuse to make them plain because it would be “boring”

Sorry, I’ve got to rant a bit. Recently it was my birthday and even though my parents know next to nothing about my interests while also not trying to get to know them better, they still insist on making me surprise presents instead of some simple everyday items or straight up cash. They think there’s “no fun in that”. They did that for almost my entire childhood whenever I didn’t have a specific wish or when I wished for something that was too expensive to expect it as a gift, so I’d just save for it and buy it myself later.

I love my parents and they’ve always tried their best being there for me when I needed them, so I don’t want to be ungrateful. But they do. not. care. about my interests. It’s hard to like a present that probably(?) came from the heart but wasn’t very well thought through. So it’s not even “the thought that counts” because while there was a good will, there was not much of a thought. I won’t go into details about what it is, just know that now there’s another gift sitting in my apartment, that I neither like for itself nor can I use it, sell it or throw it away. Especially in this case because they signed it…

It actually would have been fine if it was just some chocolate, shampoo and a pair of socks - Items I can use everyday - and it’d still be a surprise of sorts. Or a bit of cash like 10-20€, then I’ll just save it for whatever I wanna buy for myself. That’s basically what I do when someone doesn’t tell me/I don’t know a specific wish they may have. I know for many it’s a lame gift, but at least it’s safe to have its uses.

And as if that wasn’t enough, my little brother who is 12 years old drew and wrote a card for me in the style of my favorite show. Pretty plain and simple on first glance but actually very personal. He knows my interests and invests his time into making me something this special. Not everybody has the time and energy to do so, especially since my parents are getting rather old, but I’m not even expecting them to invest so much time and effort into a relatively unimportant birthday.

I’m probably not the only one with parents like that, but anytime I give them signals about how I feel concerning their presents without hurting their feelings, they become denser than a black hole.