The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/Maleficent_Reason132 on 2024-10-12 01:40:04.
My mother taught me how to sew and bake at an early age. Consequently i would say I’m pretty good at both. Since i got married,my inlaws have occasionally asked me to hem dresses for them, and to bake cookies or cupcakes for random events. I didn’t mind because i would take it as a compliment that they would want me to do this for them.
However, recently my sister in law has taken up thrifting, so she has been dropping off about three items a week for me to alter. And my mother in law started a new job about 4 months ago, and she has asked me to bake for her monthly work potlucks.
I have never charged them, but my sil will bring me Starbucks and my mil will bring me the ingredients for whatever i am baking. The truth is that i am now feeling resentful about being expected to do things for them, when they could just learn how to do this themselves. I have offered to teach them, but they always say that they don’t need to learn since they like the way i do things.
This month i told them that i could still help them with each project but they have to stay and hang out with me while i do them. This way they can watch and learn so they can eventually do it on their own. I told my mil what day and time to be at my home so we can bake the cupcakes together. She said she might not be able to. So i said “if you dont come hang out then you’ll have to stop by a bakery and buy them instead”.
Two weeks ago my sil dropped off 2 dresses for me to alter the hem,and i told her that I’ll get to them whenever she can come over and watch how i do it. She said she would let me know, but hasn’t yet. She didn’t look too happy with this.
We all get along and i know they like me, and I know that it’s not that they dont want to hang out with me, its just that they don’t want to learn. I think they just want me to keep doing it for them.
After i told my husband about all this, he implied that i was mean for changing how i do things. And that if I dont want to do these projects for them, then just say so. I think it’s only fair. Im sure my inlaws also think that im the a-hole for my new expectations. So AITA?