The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/Ok-Outside7067 on 2024-09-30 13:54:58.

my mum (44) was diagnosed with cancer recently and most of my friends know now since I live in a small town so I guess parents talk. some of my mates (all 16) came over to my (16m) house for something and there wasnt anyone home because my brother (22) and my mum were at the clinic. I guess they noticed this because in the past when they would come to my house my mum would usually be there because she works at night. in particular one of my mates tom asked and I just told all of them what happened.

even though I was sure most of them knew already they did look sorry. but tom didn’t really get it I guess and said “does that mean she’ll start chemo”, I said yeah and tom kind of made this joke, “well hope your mums still fit (hot) after she loses all that hair”

tom is always like this in the sense that he always makes insensitive jokes and I knew he was joking but I got really mad and told him to shut up. we shouted at each other for a while and the rest of them thought it would be better to just cancel the meetup and go home.

after a few days I heard tom was telling people that my mum had cancer like people that I barely knew and he just kept spreading it. I dont know how true this part is but I also heard he says that my brother had to work 2 jobs to support us since my dads not really around and I told him that in private. I asked him to stop it and he said that almost everyone knew already so there was no point and he was just telling the truth when they asked him.

tom hasnt apologised but hes trying to ignore that it ever happened and talks to me as usual. some of my friends think tom really shouldn’t have said that but a few have told me to just suck it up and not be mad anymore or else itll just make stuff more awkward. when I told my brother he told me not to apologise and offered to write a note to our form head or something. at that point I was really angry so I just agreed.

after I complained to my form head tom was pulled out of class and I didnt hear what happened but after he came back he looked pissed and ignored me for the rest of the day. the next day he walked up to me and told me to stop being so sensitive and that I didn’t have to lodge a formal complaint against him.

I dont know if Ive just blown this out of proportion because now our circle of friends is all really awkward and nobody really wants to acknowledge it. a few of them told me to just move on and told me that I really shouldn’t have gotten him in trouble like that