The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/throwaway922038 on 2024-06-14 19:27:55.

I realize the irony of posting this but have kept it anonymous with a throwaway account

My gf works for a big tech company and is paranoid about having anything posted about her. She has a linkedin and no other social media. She uses an off brand high security phone. She won’t let friends post photos of them at clubs. She won’t let family post her holding her niece. I respected this for the 2 years we were dating. I’ve also managed the relationship with my mom who is a bit of an over sharer and likes to post often on Facebook. But last week when we discussed hypothetically getting married next year she said I can’t post any mention of her if we were engaged, married or having kids etc.

I’m really weirded out but she claims with layoffs happening her company could find out she is making these moves and lay her off because they are afraid of her taking maternity leave. I think it’s a little ridiculous that posting an engagement photo will result in being put on a company’s short list to lay off in case there are children in the future. I told her there are important moments and I want to share them.

She told me I could PM anyone I want and let them know not to share the news and post on IG if I keep her name and photos out of it. But I feel like she’s being paranoid and this is asking a lot. She got angry and began ranting about as a guy I never have to worry about these things but she knows friends it’s happened to and it’s difficult to prove and can ruin their careers. I asked how she plans to ask for maternity leave if she won’t even let her manager know she’s pregnant and she said she will send an email with enough notice for the company to prepare but not enough for them to lay her off and not look suspicious. I have never heard of someone going to such great lengths to prevent this and I told her my social media use is up to me and she said it is and if I don’t agree to this she will say no if I ask her to marry me. I feel like this is an odd hill to die on for her but AITA for wanting to post about big life updates online?