- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion
- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion
Workers who leave the head office to buy a cup of coffee are costing an Australian mining firm too much money, according to its boss.
Managing director of Mineral Resources Chris Ellison said during a financial results presentation on Wednesday he wants to “hold staff captive all day long”.
“I don’t want them leaving the building,” he said.
The head office in Perth has a restaurant, nine staff psychologists, a gym, and other facilities designed to encourage staff to stay in the office.
“We have a lot of different benefits that we have brought on,” said Mr Ellison, whose company has a strict “no work from home policy”.
"Why have I done that? Because when I get them first thing in the morning, I want to hold them captive all day long. I don’t want them leaving the building.
Dude can’t even cross his arms normally. Clearly an alien imposter trying to exert control over he human population.
Dude probably drinks water like this:
I legit thought the Zuck one was slowed down for effect but then the lady in the background started typing normal speed. WTF is wrong with these people?
He’s ready for his coffin