“Welcome to work. Here is your computer, your free corporate swag, and all the terrible enterprise software that will cripple your productivity.”
“When our overly aggressive security software inevitably locks you out next month, please let us know by filing a ticket at this IT portal. You will not have access to said portal once you’re locked out.”
“If you are remote, please do make sure that you know the phone number of at least one friendly co-worker, because you’ll need to interrupt their morning to beg them to scour the corporate intranet to find the last remaining operational phone number to contact the fully remote IT department, because we laid off your one local guy last month.”
“Welcome to work. Here is your computer, your free corporate swag, and all the terrible enterprise software that will cripple your productivity.”
“When our overly aggressive security software inevitably locks you out next month, please let us know by filing a ticket at this IT portal. You will not have access to said portal once you’re locked out.”
“If you are remote, please do make sure that you know the phone number of at least one friendly co-worker, because you’ll need to interrupt their morning to beg them to scour the corporate intranet to find the last remaining operational phone number to contact the fully remote IT department, because we laid off your one local guy last month.”
Your IT department has phone numbers?!